The Britishers came to India and ruled over us for 100+ years. In the process they gave India, and especially Mumbai, a lot of things. They built the drainage system prevents Mumbai from drowning and lets the Mubaikars get away with just waterlogging. They also gave us the first local train which now is the lifeline of Mumbai and the reason for some thrills in over blatant everyday lives. They also gave us almost all the tourist spots in Mumbai like the Gateway of India, Prince of wales meuseum, the entire Fort area. Above all they gave us a globally recognised and pronouncable name "Bombay" which had to be changed after a long and bloddy battle by politicians.
The government respects thier work to such great extent that any work which can be classified as"development" over and above the Britishers "great peice of art" has been condemned and thrashed over the years- apart from teh name changing ceremony. Hence we continue using the same drainage system, water system and train system without any developments.
Anyway this post is not to praise the Britishers or criticise the government as there are lots of other people actively involved in this task. This post is about "Payback" time to the Britishers. The Britishers gave us a lot of things but oppressed us 10 times more. They robbed the treasures like the Kohinoor diamond and Tipu Sultan's Sword (which Vijay Mallya got back recently for a huge amount). Their "divide and rule" policies affect us even today. I am sure every Indian wishes that he could do something similar or worst to whatever remains of the British empire and now a Keralite has finally succeeded in doing it!!!!!!!!!
How? By launching the much dreaded, feared and mentally torturous Auto-rickshaw in UK.
Yes its true- A recent Business Today article says that this man named Ponnaiah has launched Auto-rickshaw service in the seaside town of Brighton in UK. He has 12 Auto-rickshwas as of now and he plans to expand the numbers and the presence across UK. They are called "tuk-Tuks" and shall have the Unioun flag colors on them instead of the Garish yellow and black (Mumbai) or Yellow and green (Delhi). They shall also have additional side impact bars and seat belts...whoa!!!!!! The article also points out that when a bajaj Auto person was asked to comment on this he was completely stunned and just blurted "he did what!!!".. yes even the originators dont beleive that someone can themselves create an Open Jurrasic park. :-)
How did the Britishers alllow them in the country you say - well these things shall run on CNG and considering their love for cleanliness they allowed them. However what they fail to see and what I would call "payback" is the nuisance value of the tuk-tuks. I also hope that the drivers too are Indians.
Imagine a scene on a peak hour morning on a street in London. A fine lady and gentleman are waiting on the footpath and wave down a rick. The conversation in Hinglish goes as follows
Couple: Good Morning
Rickwalla:- Where go?
Couple: What ???
RW:- Aree Baba, where you go, hurry hurry...
Couple: (Finally understanding Hinglish) - Brighton avenue
RW:- 30 pounds
Couple - What..!!!!! Isn't there a meter?
RW:- There is, But Not work ..... 30 Pounds
Couple:- Thats outrageously my friend, it is your duty to ensure that the meter is in running condition to prevent any.........
RW: ayyo amma, No talk, 30 pound ......you coming ? If not take other tuk-tuk... (starts to leave)
couple- OK OK 25 pounds final (;-) they too have learnt the Indian style of bargaining)
RW- OK saab, come come
The couple shall then go for a whirlwind tour of London, careening around corners, listening to choicest abuses over and above Himesh Reshamiya bleating out in "Jhankar beat" through the ricks music system. They shall encounter some amzing traffic jams caused by Tuk-tuk's to which their own Tuk-tuk shall add some more fire.
Finally tired,battered and drained they shall get off at their destination and hand over money for the "ride of their life"
Beautiful Payback I say . We once had the slogan "Go Back SIMON" now we shall have "Tuk-TUK Simon"
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